Crafting Chaos

Yada Yada Yarn

While in Silver City Thebes and I stopped at the local yarn store Yada Yada Yarn.

This was a nice store and they had great customer service.

I bought some Noro lace yarn. What will I make with it? I have no clue. But Noro lace yarn? I had to have it in my stash.

If you visit Silver City definitely check them out.

Add comment July 29th, 2010

Silver City

After El Paso, Thebes and I drove back to NM.

There’s some fun gas stations in this state.

We had heard Silver City was a cool town and decided to visit.

Northern New Mexico was still snow covered in March so we were looking forward to warmer temps in the southern part of the state.

Yeah I know!

We still had a fun visit. We went to some art galleries.

And visited some thrift stores. This jacket was super groovy and reminded me of my friend Ellen:

It was quite the arty town.

This cabin was by the visitor center and was used in a movie that was filmed there.

After Silver City we drove back home.

4 comments July 27th, 2010

Mother project: Epilogue

When Abbey and I started our Mother projects we wanted to heal ourselves. I am awed at the level of healing that has happened. Thebes’ and I’s trip to our families was intense and healing for both of us.

After Missouri Thebes and I drove to Michigan and Indiana. In Michigan we stayed with Thebes’ sister. We visited Thebes’ Grandma who we hadn’t seen in years. Even though it was made clear that Thebes didn’t want to see his Dad he showed up anyway. They’ve been estranged for years. Thebes has done some healing work of his own and has started remembering chunks of his childhood that was formerly blacked out.

When the doorbell rang I knew it was his father. I think we all did. Thebes and I looked at each other as his Dad walked into the room. Because we’ve been together so long we had a whole conversation just with our eyes. I asked if he wanted to leave. He said we’d stay as long as his Dad was cool. There was tension in the room but his Dad really made an effort to be nice which was surprising and touching. There was a moment where Thebes’ Grandma was all teary as she watched her son and grandson talking. I got teary too. I really felt the visit was healing for both of them.

The night before visiting my family I was starting to get nervous. My stomach was doing flip flops and I was having trouble getting to sleep. Seeing Thebes’ Dad be nice to him was such a gift from the Goddess I felt like I couldn’t ask for anything more. If my Mother refused to see me then so be it. Whatever was to happen would happen. I meditated and focused on sending out love and acceptance.

We got up early and drove through southern Indiana to my parents house. They had moved out of my childhood home into a new one. My Grandmother lives with them. It was really cute and absolutely spotless. (My mother is a clean freak. I’m not but I do have moments where I clean manically.) It was technically small but laid out really well so it felt spacious.

My Dad looked wonderful. It was so good to wrap my arms around him and give him a big hug. He’s a great dad. As a girl we were really close. And even though I’ve lived an unconventional life he’s always accepted me. My Grandma looked great as well. She’s shrunk in height and is the skinniest I’ve seen her. I got a good Grandma hug. I wore my lace and cable socks to show her. She used to be a knitter and liked them.

After that my Dad said-let’s go say hi to your Mom. He came up behind me a gave me a little shoulder rub. I almost burst into tears right there but managed to control myself. The moment of truth had arrived.

I walked in and saw my Mother. She had straight hair. It’s hard to convey to people the importance of this. All my life my Mother had perms. She had a poofball of hair, a sort of afro or halo of short curls. She always hated her straight hair and I never saw it until that day.

She looked at me and asked if I saw my Grandma. I said yes. She asked how I thought she looked. Gorgeous was my reply. It was true. She just looked so adorable-the picture perfect image of how a grandma should look. Then I told my Mom that she looked really good too. That was also true. I told her that I liked her straight hair and that it looked good on her. She commented that my hair was really long. Not a glowing compliment but I’ll take what I can get.

My Dad then took me and Thebes for a house tour. As we were going upstairs I was thinking-wow that went really great with my Mom. But more was to come. My Mother joined us upstairs and participated in the conversation. At one point she turned to Thebes and asked him something and they talked. She had only said one word to him before. At our wedding she said hello.

After the tour we started talking about dinner. My Dad had a restaurant gift card and wanted to use it. That made me smile because that is so him. I saw my Mother fiddling with my purse but didn’t think anything of it. I stopped in my Grandma’s room to say goodbye to see her once more. While I was doing that Thebes was talking to my Dad about driving to dinner. He suggested I ride with my parents to the restaurant. Yes, my Mother came to dinner with us. I was shocked and grateful.

The ride to the dinner was magical. I could feel my skin tingling. It felt like I was 12 again riding in the back seat listening to my parents just be themselves. We chatted some about family members. My Dad asked me about my Endometriosis. My Mother suggested I get a hysterectomy and to leave my ovaries in. I explained my alternative treatments. I prefaced it with the fact that Taos is new agey and that we live a more natural lifestyle.

I got to ask what age my Mother was when she had her hysterectomy. She was 31. I’m 34 now. For awhile now I’ve felt like I had to get past the age my Mother was when she had hers. Like if I could get past that age then I wouldn’t have to have the surgery. And I have. I still have to treat myself but I know I can do it now. I know it’s going to work.

We met one of my aunts for dinner. She’s my favorite Aunt and is my father’s sister. She’s also a great talker and at dinner we all talked about funny family memories. My father’s father was quite the eccentric and there’s a lot of funny stories about him. My Aunt also gave me some family mementos which almost made me cry. She gave me a wooden bead necklace that belonged to my deceased Uncle. He was my favorite uncle when I was a girl and to have something that was actually his is wonderful.

No mention was made of the previous years of non-talking between my Mother and I. I would look over at my Dad and almost start to cry. It was so good to see him! And there was my Mom-at dinner with us and participating in the conversation! I had to go to the bathroom a couple times to give myself a pep talk. I looked at myself in the mirror and said-hold it together! You can cry in the rental car missy! Seriously, my body was tingling the entire time.

There was a moment when I looked over at my Mother and she had her head propped up on her hands. I was doing the exact some thing. It was then that I realized I get a lot of my animated motions from her. Because of the Mother piece I could appreciate the good things I inherited from her. It was a special moment.

To segway for a moment-I have to give props to Outback Steakhouse. We didn’t think Thebes would be able to eat there because of his allergies. But our waitress was extremely helpful and made a special trip back to check ingredients and he was able to have a meal. It was pretty plain but still-a meal he could eat! We gave her a good tip.

After dinner we posed for pictures and my Mother stayed back, not wanting to be in the photos. She always hated to have her picture taken. But she did volunteer to take a couple pictures. As we were leaving I called out to her, thanking her for coming to dinner. She turned and gave me a little wave. I wasn’t expecting a hug. But I also wasn’t expecting on of her little waves. I got one though and was grateful for it.

As I hugged my Dad goodbye I told him thank you. I could feel the tears bubbling up and managed to hold them back. We said hugged my Aunt goodbye and walked to the rental car. As soon as I got into the car I burst into tears. I was shaking. Thebes was great and comforting. My body was tingling but my fingers and face were tingling especially hard. It’s as if I could feel the emotional healing happening in my body.

All the emotional and art work I did around my mother issues made this visit happen. It was magical. My Mother and I aren’t best friends now or anything. But she made a real effort to be pleasant and cordial and so did I. After being estranged for so long I’m overjoyed with that.

That night I sent out thanks to the Goddess, thanks to my Mother, thanks to Abbey for doing the mother project with me, thanks to everyone who supported me in this journey. It was quite an emotional experience.

The next morning we drove back to Missouri. It was an intense trip. It wasn’t a thrilling vacation like we prefer but it was a good for the soul type of vacation.

3 comments July 24th, 2010

Back to Missouri

After Indiana we made our way back to Missouri. We got to visit with Jesse (Bliss) this time. Since she was the bride she was super busy at the wedding. Her new hubby Josh was at a music festival that day so we missed him.

The back of Bliss’s car:

It was so fun to hang out with her in person again.

That’s one of her awesome paintings behind us.

Her dog Jimbay.

It was hard to get him to sit still to take a pic. He’s a very happy dog.

We stayed at Grant’s place again.

Thebes and Grant:

Grant suggested this video for a redneck look.

This is Gonzo, an M37 truck that Grant got in exchange for repairing our old landlords’ bridge.

He has beautiful Wisteria growing over his porch.

After Missouri we drove back to New Mexico. It was an exhausting trip because it was so much in so little time. But it was a really good trip. Next travel post I’ll write about the family visits.

2 comments July 7th, 2010

Broad Ripple visit

After Missouri we drove to Michigan to visit Thebes’ family. After that we drove to Indiana to visit mine. Between family visits we stopped in Broad Ripple, IN. Thebes and I met in Broad Ripple at the Rocky Horror Picture Show. I moved in with him a week later and we got married four months after that.

We went to Broad Ripple Park where we got married way back in 1994.

Here’s the spot where we exchanged vows:

Fifteen years later:

We had the reception here.

After the park we walked around town. Oh it brought back such sweet memories!

Thebes worked at that Subway when we met. Buffalo Wild Wings are some tasty wings. We ate there a few times back in the day.

We used to walk over this river all the time.

Broad Ripple still has funky little shops to explore.

See Thebes’ reflection in the pic above?

Funny advertising:

The town was hip when we lived there. Now it’s really known for it’s art culture. I was delighted to see outside art and several galleries.

Big ape!

More public art. Yay!

Good Earth was the first store Thebes went to when he moved to Broad Ripple. Not only is it still there but they added on to their building.

I was glad to see that the geese were still there.

I remember there were several that crossed the road once and backed up traffic for quite a ways.

They’re very tame around humans.

My life changed in Broad Ripple. It has a special place in my heart.

Add comment June 23rd, 2010

Midwest scenery

On the way to Missouri we stopped at a pretty rest stop.

Here’s Thebes grabbing food out of the rental car. Since he has food allergies we filled up the back seat with a cooler and bin of food. It worked out pretty well and thankfully he didn’t have a reaction during our trip.

I worked on the Noro blanket while Thebes drove.

The Fork accompanied us during our travels. It was an inside joke gift from our friend Grant. Now we either take vacation pics with the Penguin or the Fork.

Add comment June 16th, 2010

Jesse and Josh wedding

In May we drove back to the Missouri for Jesse and Josh’s wedding. (She also goes by Bliss.)

She got married at Ritter Springs Park. It’s a pretty park. We went to a wedding there a few years ago. To be funny Thebes wore the same groovy shirt to this wedding that he did to the last one.

It was a lovely day for a wedding.

We hung out with Jackie and Paige. They lived with us at the commune. They were some of my favorite people there and it was wonderful to see them. Paige was 12 the last time we saw her and now she’s in college. They both looked so pretty!

They had a harp player. He was pretty good.

The groom Josh

The two mothers

The couple got a drum blessing.

Their dog Jimbay

He helped with the ceremony. Such a cutie.

Oh they look so adorable and so much in love!

Josh’s cousin has a beautiful, restored Model T from 1915. He drove the bridal party to the wedding and then drove the happy couple to the reception.

The car was stunning. He was nice and talked to us about the restoration.

A close up of the car flowers

The couple cuts the cake. It was red and pink velvet cake and delicious.

Thebes and Tom

Tom also lived with us at the commune. He still lives there. He was one of our favorite people there. He was always nice and it was great to talk to him. His laugh sounded just the same.

Me with Anne and Bert

Anne and Bert also lived at the commune, Bert is still there. Anne was there with her daughter Sylvan who is now 11. We lived at the commune when she was born. Jesse and Anne and I used to hang out together.

Bert is another great commune member. He’s very creative and we had a great conversation about art.

Jesse’s sister Molly, her mom and niece Lydia (her sister Hannah’s daughter)

Me and the lovely bride

Jesse had a lot of handmade details at the wedding and reception. A pretty bouquet:

She painted this for the wedding.

In addition to all the little handmade details of the wedding Bliss also made thank you gifts for everybody. The bags had flower seeds and birdhouses.

Pictures from the park.

This was a great spot for a wedding.

It was a lovely wedding. As soon as the bridal party drove up in the Model Ts I knew it was right to come. I cried all through the wedding-it was just so beautiful.

The reception was great. We got to hang out with old commune friends. That was so wonderful. When we left the commune we were full of anger and bitterness. But it’s been long enough that now we can look back and appreciate the good times. The commune really changed our lives. It got us out of the rat race, turned us on to alternative living and cultures and it’s even the the reason we go by Twilight and Thebes.

Petty politics and asshole drunks caused us to leave the commune. But now we were able to laugh about them. There was one guy who was a really bad alcoholic and we all had a funny story about him. There was a moment when we were sitting at a picnic table and reminiscing about old commune memories. It felt so good to be in that moment.

It was a lovely day!

Add comment June 12th, 2010

Midwest road trip

Thebes and I got back home late last night. Where did we go? One of my favorite people, Bliss (also known as Jesse), got married! The pic above is of Jesse and Josh walking down the aisle. It was a beautiful wedding. I cried lots of happy tears!

After Missouri, Thebes and I drove up to Michigan to see his family. After that we drove to Indiana to see mine. And my Mother talked to me! But that event deserves a post all its own.

In Indiana we stopped at the park where we got married. It was so wonderful to go back for a visit.

In nine days we drove around 3,800 miles and we saw 21 people we haven’t seen in years. Plus people we often see-like Grant, who let us stay at his house. It was a great trip but it was very tiring. We both slept in today and it felt great.

Lots and lots of pics to come!

Add comment June 5th, 2010

Franklin Mountains State Park

While in El Paso Thebes and I visited Franklin Mountains State Park.

I took this pic on our way out. We had to be out by a closing before they locked the gates.

The scenery was gorgeous.

We hiked on a couple trails. The paths weren’t easy. All the rocks were hard on our feet.

The park is really big-almost 25,000 acres total. It’s the largest urban park in the US and is part of the city of El Paso.

Thebes took some pictures with his large format camera. I had the Penguin pull a Crasher Squirrel moment.

There was so much beauty everywhere!

The yuccas were so big!

This yucca stalk looked like a spinal cord to me.

Thebes in the car, figuring out the way back to our hotel.

After our El Paso visit we headed back to New Mexico.

1 comment May 22nd, 2010

El Paso visit

Between his dental visits, Thebes and I explored some of El Paso. We went to the El Paso Museum Of Art.

Me with a big statue and a little penguin:

Museums are understandably picky about photos inside. But there was a spot where photos were allowed. They had an exhibit that featured WWII propaganda posters for food conservation.

Funny how the posters still apply today.

Their gift shop was very fun.

356 penguins

This was a really neat pouch that had a long zipper and funky shape.

I’m usually disappointed with art museum bathrooms. Even as a girl I felt their bathrooms should be decorated artistically somehow. El Paso had the best bathroom I’ve seen in awhile.

Thebes’ allergies mean we can’t eat out at many restaurants. But sushi has always been a safe bet. We found some while on the road.

Add comment May 16th, 2010